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Keep It Trini

Hey folks, it's been a while. Since the last time I've released two free mixtapes that you've may not haven't heard yet and some videos you probably haven't yet watched. As a result let me get you up to speed. And remember, KEEP IT TRINI3 IS GOING TO BE RELEASED CHRISTMAS DAY ONLINE FOR FREE!!!! Yeah. Face out.


KEEP IT TRINI PT 1 FREE DOWNLOAD


KEEP IT TRINI PT 2 FREE DOWNLOAD

Incident On Synergy

As some of you may or may not know, I was scheduled to appear on Synergy twice last week. The first appearance was for an interview and performance on Jason's Synergy Wednesdays segment and the second was a full performance on Friday Nights live. This was the plan but things were thrown off course by some cellphone carrier cheese and I'm not talking about trouble with my phone.

For the Wednesday segment I performed the song "Stress" mainly in another attempt to get the video in Synergy rotation (I was unsuccessful but that's another story). The performance itself went well but problems arose because the last most compelling verse of "Stress" which I performed contained two apparently very damaging bars: "but ah try to reply but you know de style/ is no more credit from Bmobile". You can listen to the whole song below to get context.



Now the song is a storytelling track about university life and its stresses but the line in isolation was a problem because Digicel sponsored the show and apparently mentioning Bmobile is like saying Beetlejuice. No scene there. Wendell asked me if I was performing the song Friday and I said no since from long before I decided I would debut an entirely new track.

However, the debut wasn't meant to be. Friday around midday Wendell called and informed me that apparently word got to Bmobile about the performance and they were apparently toting over the fact that I said that my Bmobile phone had no more credit since that apparently is never supposed to happen and consequently it would be better that I don't perform in the said show since it was Bmobile-sponsored... dum dum dum.

Personally I don't feel no way about the whole situation. Carriers sponsor music programmes to photoshop their image and make people believe that they care about culture when their agenda is just one of promoting their brand to a target audience. I get that. I can get why Digicel would catch feelings. However, I can't understand why Bmobile would consider that line (when taken in context) offensive especially considering that it's a realistic situation. I've literally performed Stress over a hundred times and people who are hearing the track for the first time always go Destra for that line.

Since Friday, I've spoken with people on Facebook and they spout platitudes like "it's a business" and you have to "dress for success" and conform or whatever and while I understand where they're coming from, everyone especially artistes need to 'draw' their own line. This may come as a surprise to many but artistes don't get paid from Synergy appearances. I've made more money in profit from my first mixtape "Recession Music" as a 'nobody' than some artistes who have gotten radio play. My line comes in defending the integrity of my message for the sake of people who enjoy my music aka 'the fans' since they will outlive Synergy's tenure as the number one and currently only dedicated local music channel.

So in conclusion I would just like to also indicate that had they asked me not to perform "Stress" I would have complied. Had they asked me to perform the song but change the lyrics I would not have complied. And with the song being performed, with the cat already out of bag, I believe Bmobile shoulda just hold a burn since they didn't sponsor the segment and should have taken consolation in the fact that I wasn't going to perform the song in their segment. Everybody knows the network is shoddy anyway and the video for "Stress" has like almost 4500 views on youtube so if it was really carrier-kryptonite sufficient damage has already been done. And since they didn't hold a burn I will be using the experience as fuel for my upcoming mixtape Keep It Trini 2 (check the first one Keep It Trini). Face out.

New Video - "All The Things"

Check out this new video via Detnator featuring me called "All The Things". The beat and video were both produced by Detnator. Trust me, it big. Face out.

The 2011 Soca Monarch Consolation Prizes

Well soca monarch done so by now allyuh know de scene (if not check the results here). The two million was taken by Mr HD leaving many real bitter and sticky sticky (word to Kendall). Being the thoughtful and considerate person that I am though, I realise that a lot of people deserved special mention for their unique 'performances' and weren't rewarded via a two million purse or via some type of attention or notification. So in light of that, I present to you, the soca monarch consolation prizes.

1) The WTF award (Shurwayne Winchester) - Hoss, wah was dat dawg? Even actor dude from "The Wire" was hating and he not even from trini. Dem children coming out at the end was real Michael Jacksonesque too. (Special mention to Jahmoun for bringing on Macka Diamond...to wine???? Dude, ppl still in debate whether she's really a woman.)

2) The Mango Chow Fruitiness award (Peter Elias) - This man give realll trouble, even before he start to get frass. Quote of the night by dude - "I don't mean to be a pageant boy but..." Now as I say before, I not being homophobic eh but hossss...

3) The St Ans. Head gone award (Destra Garcia) - Mih girl performance start off in a bed and unfortunately never woke up after that. Strangely, instead of choosing to sing any of her power hits that people knew she decided to sing her pan song instead (??). Then when she realise the crowd was in statue mode, she trip out and proceeded to throw the biggest bf I've ever seen on local television. Her off-key actions included trying to get the crowd to chant "No Advantage" in an attempt to spite Machel, general toting about random mad ppl stuff onstage and running her own dancers off stage citing the fact that "odder people had to perform. I'm a huge fan of her eh but dat need some couch sessions.

4) The Word Vomit award (the young female presenter between performances)- Smallie definitely was a case for less is more. Her crimes included going several sentences of no interest without taking a breath, interrupting her male companion by the phrase (not even a complete sentence he got most times word to Jerome), replacing the trini word "picong" with her version "peacock" and attributing a hit song to Michelle Xavier (sorry Michelle yuh know de scn, collateral damage).

5) The Common Sense award (Ravi B) - Before mih boy even come on stage he was getting boo normel. I was smelling a Sonny Mann level bottle pelting in the vicinity but home boy maneuver through it well like POS traffic and even get the crowd to give a response albeit by invoking the name of Iwer. Still, I was disappointed by the missed irony of him receiving a bottle pelting so soon after requesting one in soca chutney frustration.Next time I guess.

6) The Anything Goes wotlessness award (Machel Montano) - The crowd wasn't really moving to HD so much initially despite some good props by mih boy so he decided to do something about it and go for the jugular on Bunji. The delivery was so so and the punchline was sloppily put together but the sentiment was something we've been whispering about years now...who really wearing de pants in dat relationship, eh?

7) The Indecent wotlessness award (All Rounder) - With a children hampering pants that probably had his boys in a vice grip (good ting he have children already eh), this guy proceeded to remove his jersey to reveal a netted or as a trini would say, "see through" vest underneath that revealed way to much of his 71 year old physique. And that was before he humped the ground vigorously while one of his danced gyrated on his back. Grampa wasn't easy at alllll.

8) Most Inappropriate Soca Soubriquet award (Blood) - "Blood" as a soca artiste name? Really hoss?

9) Let sleeping dogs lie award (Bunji) - So after Machel hit Bunji hard he came out to perform and just went crazy on de man. He didn't directly answer the question about who's the man in the relationship between he and Fay-Ann but he sure hit him hard in other ways. Thank you Machel for re-awaking the lyrical Bunji.

10) The fickleness award (Soca Monarch crowd) - One minute is Iwer, then Machel. Then dey booing Machel, then is Bunji, then Fay-Ann. Facebook views were way more streamlined by comparison but then again we were sober.

Some Tips For the 2011 Soca Monarch Front Runners

Ever since the soca monarch cash prize went bulimic and ballooned to 2 million TT it seems like everyone wants a piece. Ghost of soca monarchs past have re-emerged and steadfast principles have left quickly like patrons after a Machel performance. The semi-finals took place last weekend and coming out of that there have been some front runners, plenty ole talk and some of the bacchanal that we trinis like to see. As a trini, I believe I have some advice for the front-runners so if you want that stadium flag money listen close.

POWER SOCA ADVICE

Machel Montano - Machel you doing good but right now you too predictable. "Advantage" while a good song sounds like three other songs you had before but daz no scn, you could still take them. What we need though is a surprise, something like the rocket man in the first Alternative Concept or Wyclef roaring on the stage via a motorcycle for AC 5. Also play on the word "advantage"...some how.

Fay-Ann - Fay-Ann, soca monarch is your crowd and you're a descendant of royal soca legacy so keep working that. You're doing everything right so far so keep pumping.

Bunji - Bunji, we know your song is about fire but we need more fire from you. You do your best work when you're angry about something like "Fete is Fete" which could have been road march btw if everyone could have afforded to play mas but daz another story. Freestyle something too, attack somebody. And go at Machel, we all want to see you attack the king.

Destra - Destra, stop going on radio stations feeling sorry for yourself. We get it, you've been robbed in the past but oh gosh, move on nah. Then again, maybe you don't have to. If you can channel you inherent bitterness and bitchiness (your words not mine) then the spectacle will at least be legendary.

GROOVY SOCA ADVICE

Kes - Kes, groovy soca is basically yours. "Wotless" will be the song people remember when they think about 2011 and may even become your signature song after this. However, you need to step your game up dawg. Yuh cyah sing a song about wotlessness and be playing pretty boy ting on stage. Yuh ha to get dutty, remove them pretty backup dancers and get some more wotless ones. Plus is not about anyone, is about you. Remember you said it, "this year ah moving wotless". Don't just say it homie, do it.

Benjai - Benjai, you're a naturally charismatic fella, one who can perform in ah ole vest and still mash up any crowd. However dawg, yuh not going to win groovy like that but then ah not sure if you even care about winning. If you do, then any effort from you should give you the win as well, you know yuh song bess and everybody love it.

Destra - Same as before Destra. "Cool it down" is a bess song but your challenge is to try to embody the song by being the opposite of yourself...sweet. You still look good so try feminine it up and let de ppl like yuh.

Cassie - Right now mih boy, you are de dark horse in this race but trust me, you could take it. People might fight you down but your song authentic as hell and anybody who tief ah wine walking de road jouvert morning or Carnival Tuesday know bout dem "town ting". If you can sell dat authenticity properly you just might pull it from the thoroughbreds.

And iz dat. That's my advice for the Soca Monarch 2011. Much love to all the contestants and good luck to dem all. If you have any more advice, feel free to add it in the comments. Face out.

The Chuck Norris Laws (Trinidad Style)

If you're familiar with the original Chuck Norris internet scene then you know that Chuck Norris is a pretty strong guy who can do amazing things. Well, on Facebook a few weeks ago a friend of mine Kendall "Icekream" Arneaud decided to explore the Chuck Norris scene within a trini context and the results are below. Big up Q D Ross, Merriq Estates, Kendall, Baidawi and yours truly for contributions. Trust me, is reallll funny stuff.


1) Chuck Norris beats his steel pan with his bare knuckles.

2) When Chuck Norris puts on a bata bullet, it becomes a bata missile.

3) Chuck Norris told Bunji to change his name from fireman to waterboy...and he did

4) Chuck Norris' version of the dollar wine goes: cent, 5 cent, 10 cent, 100!

5) Chuck Norris kicks roast corn into chilli bibbi.

6) Buhwamoder sang slap chop for chuck Norris....Chuck Norris slapped him and chopped him

7) Bmobile gives Chuck Norris' phone reception everywhere.

8) The iPhone logo on Chuck Norris' cell has a capital I.

9) Chuck Norris finds Angostura bitters sweet.

10) TTT never signed off in Chuck Norris' house.

11) Chuck Norris orders his pepper with slight doubles

12) Iwer george wrote the hand hand hand song after receiving one slap from Chuck Norris

13) The strongman toffee was made of Chuck Norris' snat

14) When Chuck Norris waving a rag in a fete, Jamaica does be on hurricane watch.

15) For Chuck Norris, a trip to tobago is a 2 hour boat ride, 5 minute plane ride or 1 minute swim.

16) Chuck Norris still smokes weed in Globe

17) CHUCK NORRIS cud PLAY MAS cause POWDER fraid him!

18) What Chuck Norris considers to be wining low is what we call limbo.

19) You could actually get chook by Chuck Norris' bbm pin.

20) When Chuck Norris bowling the wicket keeper does stand up by the boundary.

21) Chuck Norris can tell you where the man with the hammer gone

22) The active ingredient that gives diana power mints their sting is Chuck Norris sweat.

23) If yuh spill puncheon Chuck Norris will rough you up for wasting chaser.

24) Chuck Norris posts status updates on a real wall.

25) Chuck Norris tweets with real birds

Ten Reasons Why Bad Soca Music Is YOUR Fault

1) You convinced Machel that Road March is more important than good music, the opposite of what he learned years ago.


2) You let Iwer George win road march with a song containing a chorus that mentions the word "hand" over 20 times.


3) You let ragga soca aka 'soca with lyrics' die rendering Bunji Garlin a fish out of water.


4) You robbed Destra Garcia at least one soca monarch and two road march titles.


5) You only now realised in 2011 that Benjai is a big artiste.


6) You let Chinese Laundry advantage KMC in years when he had several big tunes.


7) You let Shurwayne Winchester win road march twice with the same song.


8) You disapprove of chutney rum songs but support them under the influence of rum.


9) You support(ed) the trend of half-assed dancehall soca collaborations starting with "Rubber Waist" by Machel and Red Rat (yeah I liked that song but it was half-assed).


10) You let deejays not only control what gets played via the soca mafia but now make a hustle out of we music.

Da Face: Music Plans for 2k11

Hey folks was de scene. I haven't updated my blog in about two months being busy dropping my new mixtape "Recession Music 2" but all that's going to change this year. First off, I'm outlining my musical plans so you will know what to look out for. I have captured everything in a short video but if vids aren't your thing you can also catch the gist even further down.



1) Three free mixtapes in 2011 - you have to join the mailing list to access them though (check below)





2) A music video for "Born Smart" soon after carnival. It will most likely be done by Aaron "Tiny" Richards, the same guy who did the video for "Stress".

3) At least three shows from me. I'll still be in open mics across the country but those three shows will be my personal productions.

Yeah so that's it in a nutshell. Stay tuned for more updates. Face out.